It’s Better To Love
There are a lot of hoops to jump through when you go to school out of the country. As a Canadian about to start grad school in the States, I feel bogged down by paperwork. Some of that includes a health form regarding my immunization history. That is how I found myself in a health clinic today, realizing that I needed one more shot to be completely vaccinated. I’ve always loathed needles. Since I was small the very sight of them has brought out in me pitiful sobs and I begin to sweat, grow tense, wriggle and fidget. Today, the nurse commented on how well I did considering my phobia. I told her it’s due to the thousands (more like hundreds) of needles I had to endure leading up to and following Zachary’s birth and death, and in the nine months of genetics testing...
Read MoreYeggies Results and The True Reward
The first weekend of May saw the social networking scene of Edmonton (#yeg) come out to celebrate the Yeggies, the best of new media awards. My very own Wanted Chosen Planned was nominated in the Family and Parenting category. Yay! (Thanks everyone who nominated me!) On the night of the award ceremony I squeezed my post-3 baby body into a new dress and my husband and I hit the town. Unfortunately my blog was not chosen as the award recipient… and at first this stung a little, as to be expected. YET… On the drive home I received an email from a woman who reads my blog. She shared with me how encouraged she felt after discovering Wanted Chosen Planned and reading all the posts as she grapples with life after her own losses. Then a Facebook message...
Read MoreHappy Mother’s Day?
Mother’s Day is complicated when your child has died, especially if you have no other living children. After the loss of my precious Zachary I thought, “Who am I?” as the following year elapsed without my consent and sadness festered. Other common feelings for those whose child has passed away include: What am I? Am I still a mother? I never had the opportunity to bring my baby home, feed him or her, change diapers, teach reading and bike riding or any of the other normal things mom’s get to do… So what does Mother’s Day mean for me? When hearing the question, “Am I a mother?” without hesitation I will tell you, “Yes!” From the moment you conceived and a love for your child blossomed in your heart, I believe you were and continue to be a mother. As you...
Read MoreOut of Sight but Not Out of Mind
I’m sure you have heard the saying, “Out of sight, out of mind.” It makes me think of all the little household projects I want to do but haven’t gotten around to since the supplies are tucked neatly away. Whenever I open our laundry room cupboard I see the paint to touch up our scratched table and think, ‘Oh ya, I forgot about that!’ but once the door is closed once more I forget about the paint all over again. Out of sight, out of mind. This phrase bothers me when I think about Zachary. He is not with me, he is not physically in sight but that does not mean he is ever far from my mind. I think about my son every day. For me, my child is out of sight but not out of mind. One blessing of having other children is being able to look at them and see my son. Hannah...
Read MoreSharing our Children’s Birth Stories
I read an interesting post called “Family Storytelling” on the blog for the Centre for Family Literacy. The post was by Jonna Grad and encouraged parents to tell their children the story of their birth. The idea is to build strong bonds and encourage language development through oral storytelling. I remember my mom telling me the story of my birth when I was young. We would cuddle up before I went to sleep and she would describe the wintery night when she went into labor with me and how her and my dad rushed to the hospital. These are precious memories. After reading “Family Storytelling” I asked my 3 year old daughter Hannah if she wanted to hear the story of when she was born. She eagerly nodded with much curiosity. After telling her the story multiple times,...
Read More