Yeggies New Media Nomination for Wanted Chosen Planned
I am honoured that Wanted Chosen Planned has been nominated for a Yeggie, an Edmonton media and blogging award, for three years in a row. That tells me that people are reading – thank you so much for that! Sharing my life since losing my son Zachary is both a blessing and a challenging reminder, but I am so thankful for the opportunity to help other people. That is what makes everything worth while. When Zach died, I felt so alone in the world. I believed that no one understood and that my burden was mine to carry alone. I have since found, through opening up about my experience, that we as a community of bereaved families can lean on each other and offer hard earned wisdom that only those who have walked through the valley of the shadow of death couple...
Read MoreWill My Family Ever Be Complete? The Decision to have a Child after Loss
Having children after the death of a child can be one of the scariest decisions and processes there is. For some, conception alone is not an easy road. For others, the stress only begins when the two pink lines appear… side-by-side with the realization that nine months is a long time to worry for the safety and health of your next child. BUT, before all these joys and worries, is the decision to have another child in the first place. I believe it is important to note that not everyone has this ability to chose – and that is a loss worth grieving in itself. The very question of whether or not to try again can cause an emotional rollercoaster. Of course the decision to have more children is influenced by many factors – yet for people who have previously lost...
Read MoreThe Compassionate Friends National Conference 2015
I will be presenting at the 38th annual National Conference for The Compassionate Friends. The conference is for people to remember, celebrate and grieve the death of their child, grandchild or sibling. The event will take place July 10 to 12, 2015 in Dallas Texas. My two workshop sessions are: Art-Making to Rejuvenate Bereavement Professionals and Volunteers Creative Writing to Rejuvenate Bereavement Professionals and Volunteers While it is always emotional being in community with other bereaved parents, grandparents, siblings and friends, the opportunity to reflect and grow through grief is a time I treasure. If you want more information about The Compassionate Friends National Conference, please click here. If you would like to bring these or other...
Read MoreThe Ripple Effects of Loss
On the outside I look like a normal functioning person, but the ripple effects of my son’s death still startle me. Just this week, the day home woman who cares for my two living kids asked me if I was okay if she ran an errand taking her daughter and my two-year-old son Eden with her (the older kids were still in school). Her request shouldn’t have bothered me since she takes the two toddlers to music class every week – but for some reason I was petrified. Maybe it was my mood that day, but all I could picture was a car crash and my son being badly injured… Or worse. Since Zachary, I tend to imagine the unthinkable in terms of my living children’s safety. I fixated on that car trip all morning and texted the woman asking her to let me know once they were...
Read MoreHas the way you celebrate your deceased child changed over time?
Four and a half years have passed since Zachary died. I am a different person now than I once was – and so too has my family changed since our loss. We have grown – not only in number as we welcomed Eden two years ago, but we are also growing-up as our kids’ age and my husband and I pursue education and careers. In many ways I feel my grief and my need for acts of remembrance for Zachary have changed as well. Sometimes these feelings of change make me uncomfortable. Take Christmas for example. I want to remember that Zachary’s original due date was a few days before Christmas and I want to think about him as I spend time with my family over the holidays – but I don’t want to slip into the sadness of my loss amidst the happy times – not anymore. I once went...
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