Baby Steps Memorial Walk this Saturday
This coming Saturday, October 5, 2013 is the first annual Baby Steps Memorial Walk: “A special walk to remember all babies who have died during pregnancy or anytime after birth. Together, we will take the baby steps our little ones did not have the chance to walk.” I am very honored to be the keynote speaker for the Baby Steps Memorial Walk. I have been thinking about what I want to say for a long time; even before the event was created I had a message on my heart. I hope that everyone who comes will be encouraged on their journey of healing. Details: Saturday, October 5, 2013 Registration: 12:30pm (in the hall) Ardrossan Hall at Festival Place, Sherwood Park, Alberta Following registration, the program will take place outdoors in the park where we will walk...
Read MoreGuest Blogging on The Stars Apart
It is always fun to make friends through blogging. I discovered a kindred spirit in Lisa Sissons who writes a blog called The Stars Apart. She too has lost a child and also, coincidentally, lives in Edmonton, Alberta. Today Lisa published a guest blog post I wrote for The Stars Apart about my experience losing Zachary. It is called, “A Change of Plans.” Anyone who has lost a child will understand the loss of future and needed change of plans that this experience necessitates. As always, I hope my words can be an encouragement to readers. Grief can be a long journey but it needn’t be a lonely one. I believe we are stronger, better, smarter, happier and healthier together. Together we can get through our most trying times. Please check out The Stars Apart. You can...
Read MoreGiving Grace & Understanding
I’ve had several times in my life where I have experienced truly rude and insensitive people. I’m sure anyone who has lost a child has come in contact with oblivious individuals who say things that leave a sting. Yet this phenomenon is not isolated. There was a woman who yelled at me in Michaels when I accidentally budded her in line. There was a woman who told my daughter to “shut up” when she was crying in the bathroom of an art gallery. I’m sure you could add to this list. We all need to extend grace to each other. Instead of assuming the worst, let’s give each other the benefit of the doubt. I’m sure most people have good intentions. If we all were to live like this, I believe the world would be a much happier place. One of these ‘rude encounters’ occurred as...
Read MoreDon’t Play the Shame Game
One summer day, back in 2010, I was visiting friends out in the country. Our kids played in the backyard while my two girlfriends and I sipped lemonade in the shade, talking about motherhood. My friend Liz had two kids, Sarah had three, one a newborn that slept in her lap, and I had Hannah. I was also pregnant with Zachary at the time. “I’m totally done,” said Liz, “Two is enough for me.” “I don’t know,” Sarah pondered, stroking the head of her tiny baby. “I could see myself having one more.” We talked as women in control. We controlled when we got pregnant, how we would deliver, and how many kids we would have. Control… We talked about how easy it was for us all to get pregnant, and thankfully had no complications. I felt so proud at that time, on top of the...
Read MoreHappy Mother’s Day?
Mother’s Day is complicated when your child has died, especially if you have no other living children. After the loss of my precious Zachary I thought, “Who am I?” as the following year elapsed without my consent and sadness festered. Other common feelings for those whose child has passed away include: What am I? Am I still a mother? I never had the opportunity to bring my baby home, feed him or her, change diapers, teach reading and bike riding or any of the other normal things mom’s get to do… So what does Mother’s Day mean for me? When hearing the question, “Am I a mother?” without hesitation I will tell you, “Yes!” From the moment you conceived and a love for your child blossomed in your heart, I believe you were and continue to be a mother. As you...
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