The Importance of International Bereaved Mother’s Day

I just clicked “publish” on my first article as a Huffington Post regular contributor. It is called “The Importance of International Bereaved Mother’s Day.”

First of all, I want to say that I really appreciate the opportunities – both online and off – to write about loss, grief, and healing, particularly the loss of a child. When all of our voices come together, sharing stories and honouring our babies, our birth experiences and ourselves as Moms, then I believe we will change the stigma around our types of losses. Then, I hope, we will help foster a healthy cultural response to miscarriage, stillbirth, other types of pregnancy loss, and also the death of infants.

Secondly, you can help join in this conversation. One way to do this is by tweeting and posting using the hashtag #stillamom to share your story and raise awareness and support. You can also add your baby – or child of any age – to the Celebrating Sweeties remembrance page. Click here for more info. 

Click here to read – and share! – my article on The Huffington Post. 

 

If you did not know about International Bereaved Mother’s Day, here is a little info to help:

• The remembrance day was started by Carly Marie Dudly in Australia.
• The goal behind the day is to honour mothers who are grieving the loss of one or more of their children.
• The official Mother’s Day can be very hard for bereaved Moms.
• Bereaved Mother’s Day creates an opportunity to celebrate all Moms, along with the babies that they hold in their hearts.

Sunday, May 7 is International Bereaved Mother’s Day

If you know a Mom who is missing a baby, here are some ideas to help support her this weekend:

• Get her a card, acknowledging and celebrating her motherhood and her baby that died. Many mothers cherish physical objects like this after an experience where there may be very few touchable reminders of their baby.
• Spend quality time with her, going for a coffee or a walk, or gardening, painting or any other activity she enjoys. Sometimes it is better to be present than struggle for the right words. Companionship makes a huge difference.
• If her loss is recent, drop off a meal. This was one of the most helpful ways people supported me in the early days after Zach died. If it wasn’t for those meals, I think my family would have survived on take-out.

 

Losing a baby is the hardest thing any mother (and father and family) can endure. Mother’s Day can be a painful reminder.

If you are a bereaved Mom, I honour you today and every day. Your motherhood was not stolen from you and you will continue to parent your baby that died in your own unique way. If you are feeling down, reach out for support. You do not need to bear this on your own. Share your feelings with someone you trust and tell them what you need. Often those in our lives who want to support do not know the right things to do. We can help them and help ourselves by communicating our needs.

Mother’s Day, and International Bereaved Mother’s Day can be opportunities for us to remember our dearly beloved children and celebrate their short but precious lives.

 

Sending you love,

Alexis Marie