What does Fatherhood Really Mean?

What does Fatherhood Really Mean?

Today is International Bereaved Father’s Day – and I find myself asking: What does fatherhood really mean? The British dictionary defines “Fatherhood” as: the state or responsibility of being a father. Or do we relate more to this definition of what a “Father” is: a man who exercises paternal care over other persons; paternal protector or provider. Everyone’s experience of fatherhood is largely based on personal, lived experience. Therefore, fatherhood will likely look different to everyone. Still, it is easy to imagine a man: Rocking his child to sleep. Teaching the little boy or girl how to kick a soccer ball. Wrestling in the living room. Helping with math homework. Staying awake till the daughter comes home from a date. Instructing his son how to drive....

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International Bereaved Father’s Day 2015

International Bereaved Father’s Day 2015

This Sunday, September 27 is International Bereaved Father’s Day. I encourage you to reach out to a Dad you know who is living without one (or more) of his precious children. Here are some simple ways to do so: Send a text or call on the phone. Just say, “Hi, thinking of you, if you ever need to talk…” Get together with the man. Quality time means the world – even if it is just playing Mario Cart. If the man and his family are planning a time of remembrance, ask how you can support them. If you are a bereaved father, please remember: You are still a dad. It is a part of who you are, whether your child is with you or not. Embrace how you are feeling. Don’t judge yourself – and if other’s judge you, ignore them. Surround yourself with supportive people and do...

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Encouraging Test Results

Encouraging Test Results

ENCOURAGING RESULTS: Since I shared my “Struggling & How to Help” post a few weeks ago, I have received a few encouraging test results. I have had a lot of people ask if I have had any news, so I am sharing it here. It can be easier to write it out for all to read, opposed to answering the same questions over and over. The test results came back to me staggered. The first result was a little ray of hope in the darkness which felt like déjà vu. The second test result was a little more sunshine for my soul – but not total relief. Still, I feel encouraged moving forward.   WHERE I’M AT: I have told a few people about these results and have had some of those individuals sigh and say things like, “I’m so glad everything is okay,” and “thank goodness it was...

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Struggling & How to Help

Struggling & How to Help

Having a baby after losing a baby is hard. Then you add a complication to the pregnancy and everything spirals. To be honest, I am struggling right now.   What has happened in the last five days: I had my 20 week ultrasound last Tuesday. That night, our doctor called and said there may be something wrong with my baby’s heart and that it could be an indicator of a larger problem. I was making dinner at the time. The torrent of emotions nearly knocked me off my feet. I wept so hard both nostrils started bleeding. There was blood on my clothing and on my three-year-old son who ran to comfort me. Though I was making a new recipe that night, both Aaron and I lost our appetites after the call. At the same time, our instinctual coping mechanisms kicked-in. All I wanted...

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Bereaved Dads Needed for Documentary

Bereaved Dads Needed for Documentary

My team and I are still diligently working away at our first documentary, Brave New Normal: Five Mothers Break the Silence on Baby Loss. I am always planning for the future and am setting the groundwork down to make the sequel: Five Fathers Break the Silence on Baby Loss. Bereaved Dads Needed for Documentary If you or someone you know is a bereaved father, please consider being a part of this project. You can email me to get in touch: info@alexismariechute.com Here is the trailer for Brave New Normal: Five Mothers Break the Silence on Baby Loss. BRAVE NEW NORMAL: Five Mothers Break the Silence on Baby Loss Click here to view the trailer on YouTube. Hugs Alexis Marie Chute Here are other posts on the topic of documentaries: Brave New Normal, View the Trailer...

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Zuckerberg & Chan Pregnancy Announcement

Zuckerberg & Chan Pregnancy Announcement

I am always so impressed when people are brave in sharing about their losses. It is not an easy thing to do in our culture. On July 31, the Facebook founder updated his public profile with the news of their growing family. Mark Zuckerberg and Priscilla Chan’s pregnancy announcement confirmed the couple is pregnant – and with a baby girl, but also that they have been trying for years. Three miscarriages later, they posted a smiling maternity photo, Priscilla with a radiant smile and the glow of motherhood. For those of you not on Facebook, or may have missed the announcement, here it is. Mark Zuckerberg and Priscilla Chan pregnancy announcement:     The announcement shares with the world some of the challenges and confusion around miscarriage. “You feel so hopeful...

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