Celebrating Life and Giving Thanks {Guest Post}
Today I share with you a guest blog post from a woman who I ‘met’ online but now call a friend. Steffany Duke writes a blog called Spit and Sparkles, The Adventures of Raising Boy/Girl Twins. I shared Zachary’s story with her readers on July 16 and now am honored to encourage my readers this week with Steffany’s journey of strength and love. We all face different challenges but I believe we can rally our courage amongst us; we are stronger together. Thank you, Steffany, for your inspiring outlook. I’m Steffany, and I’m so thankful for the opportunity to share my story on Wanted, Chosen, Planned Blog. Eight years ago on June 22, 2005, I was undergoing surgery to remove an ovarian tumor — a surgery that I wasn’t sure I would walk away from and still...
Read More“Lottery of Loss” via Men Get Pregnant Too
Kenny Bodanis writes a parenting blog with the awesome name, “Men Get Pregnant Too.” I love it. Anyway, I had the awesome opportunity of guest blogging for Kenny (THANK YOU!). I wrote a post called, “The Lottery of Loss.” I figured a daddy blog would appreciate some stats and that’s what I gave them. I had a really great experience writing “Lottery of Loss,” it clicked. I talk about the stats that we want to be, the good numbers. Then there are the stats that we run from screaming. Unfortunately I became one of the unfortunate statistics when Zach died. If you are reading my blog maybe you are with me. Please visit Men Get Pregnant to and read my post. Please click here to visit “Lottery of Loss.” Read other posts by Kenny by visiting his blog:...
Read MoreSharing My Story on “Spit & Sparkles”
I had the honor of guest blogging about losing Zachary and life after loss on the fabulous parent blog, Spit & Sparkles. The blog is about Steffany and Derrick and their long anticipated children – twins! As I have said over and over in my posts, the strength of families finding healing is through connecting and sharing with each other. Sadly, there are a lot of us and I hope my story can encourage the Spit & Sparkles readers. If you would like to read my guest blog post, please click here. Read other posts by visiting:...
Read MoreA Belated Father’s Day Wish
I couldn’t post on Father’s Day. I wanted to but found myself stumped. It’s tough to write about male grief when it is so different from my own experience. I have given up trying to understand my husband’s response to our son’s death. It may never click with me – and that’s okay. Men and women grieve so differently on top of the fact that every individual person will have a different experience and need support in a way that is unique to them. What I do know for sure is that marriage is difficult after the loss of a child. For some, it brings them closer, for others it tears them apart. Recently I met an older woman who has also lost a child. (Sometimes I feel like I am a magnet for people like me, but then I realize that there are simply are a lot of us. A sad...
Read MoreThe Mourning Grandparent
Not long ago I received an emotional yet illuminating email from a grandmother in mourning. She read my blog and felt compelled to get in touch. This woman shared the story of how her son and daughter-in-law came to discover complications with their unborn child and that the baby was eventually stillborn. “This baby was to be my first grandchild,” the woman wrote. The email brought me to tears as I reflected upon not only the sadness of this woman but also on what my own parents may be feeling. Kindly, this woman agreed that I could share one of her thoughts with you today. She wrote about the loss of a child: “People don’t always realize that the loss is also traumatic for the potential grandparents – we deal not only with the loss of the baby, our...
Read MoreDon’t Play the Shame Game
One summer day, back in 2010, I was visiting friends out in the country. Our kids played in the backyard while my two girlfriends and I sipped lemonade in the shade, talking about motherhood. My friend Liz had two kids, Sarah had three, one a newborn that slept in her lap, and I had Hannah. I was also pregnant with Zachary at the time. “I’m totally done,” said Liz, “Two is enough for me.” “I don’t know,” Sarah pondered, stroking the head of her tiny baby. “I could see myself having one more.” We talked as women in control. We controlled when we got pregnant, how we would deliver, and how many kids we would have. Control… We talked about how easy it was for us all to get pregnant, and thankfully had no complications. I felt so proud at that time, on top of the...
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