Walk to Remember Speech by Alexis Marie Chute
Walk to Remember took place today and I am so thankful that I was asked to share words of encouragement with those who gathered. Here is my speech. I hope it touched those who attended the Walk but can also live on to encourage others who read it here on my blog. Love to you all. Walk to Remember 2012 – Children Remain in the Heart Hello, my name is Alexis Marie Chute. Thank you for the honor of speaking to you today. The first time I attended Walk to Remember I was 28 weeks pregnant with my second child, Zachary. My husband and I kept to ourselves, somberly observing. After the event, a sweet young woman approached, laid a hand on my stomach and with tears in her eyes, said, “You must be so happy to be pregnant again!” “Actually,” I told her as I hugged my baby...
Read MoreSynchronicity in our Shared Experience
It is called synchronicity in the law of attraction; when things align and come together in an almost magical, seemingly ordained manner. Last week I read a Winnie the Pooh book to my daughter and felt sweet encouragement for the journey of navigating the emotional days following the loss of my baby Zachary. I posted last Wednesday about these amazing words that Christopher Robin spoke to Pooh, words that seemed as if they were written specifically for me. Then, as I was looking around on the Edmonton Walk to Remember website, I was thrilled to find the same quote by A. A. Milne on the home page atop sweetly drawn trees with a blue bird perched above. Coincidence? I doubt it. It seems like the universe or God or whoever/whatever is out there is trying to tell...
Read MoreAlexis Marie Chute, Speaker at Walk to Remember, Edmonton 2012
I have accepted the honor of being the keynote speaker at Walk to Remember this year, which will be held in Edmonton at the end of September. When I got the call from one of the organizers asking me to speak, my first reaction was one of overwhelming gratitude and humility. Walk to Remember has played an important role in my life since I lost my son and even prior. My first time attending, back in 2010, I was only two weeks shy of losing Zachary. I was 28 weeks pregnant and round, carrying my ever present grief very physically within me. My husband and I knew what was coming for our son; it was only a matter of time. A beautiful yet sad women approached me and said, “You must be so happy to be pregnant again,” as she lay a longing hand on my stomach. “Actually,”...
Read MoreHard Advice for those Trying to Conceive
Many women who have lost a child see having another baby as the next step in their healing. While I do agree with this, I also caution women and couples not to jump too hastily into TTC (trying to conceive). Instead, I encourage spending a good quantity of time devoted to grief and healing before trying again. Our culture favors instant gratification and aims to avoid pain at all costs – but healing a broken heart is not a quick fix (a band-aid will not do the trick) or something to be avoided (we may metaphorically bleed out if not attended to). Even though the cliché saying “Time heals all wounds” makes us who have lost a child gag, there is a seed of truth to be found within that statement – although I’m sure this is not what any of us want to...
Read MoreHaving a Baby after Losing a Baby: The First Month of Life
I made it through! I have now had a baby after losing a baby. To even write these words is surreal; a miracle. I spent the nine months pre-birth engaged in a labor of a different sort; I allowed myself time to grieve and process this ‘new normal.’ I intentionally searched within myself to find healing and happiness. It was not an easy road; the path bumpy and winding – yet worth every ounce of effort. I cannot imagine having had my child without this self-nurturing and reviving process. My son Eden was born a month ago and since then I have been whisked into the cycle of short days broken up by feedings and the total adjustment of every aspect of life that a newborn brings. What I focus on is my positive delivery and the good health of my child. I cannot express...
Read MoreHaving a Baby after Losing a Baby – 39 Weeks
I recently made a friend who had a stillborn baby not long ago. When we first met I was worried as I was very obviously pregnant. Instead of recoiling in disappointment, which would have been a very natural reaction, my new friend told me that my pregnancy was actually an encouragement for her. The fact that a woman can go on from losing a child to having a healthy pregnancy and baby is heartening and something she hopes for herself as well. I was surprised at this graceful and optimistic perspective and thus hope I can share here on Wanted, Chosen, Planned about my current pregnancy without causing pain for anyone who reads. I am 39 weeks pregnant and I had an epiphany the other day about the length of gestation as it relates to us who have lost a child: It is a...
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